Learn to Avoid the Temptation of an Affair

Do you sometimes feel like other women have already snapped up all the eligible men? Have you found yourself in a situation where a man you're attracted to seems perfect, but then you find out he's unavailable? Believe it or not, you are not the only one! It's normal to be attracted to people regardless of their relationship status, but it can be very frustrating to realize that the man you want is already married.

There's really nothing wrong with imagining what could be or what you might do with that married man. Fantasizing is natural and we all do it. The point of a fantasy, however, is that it is supposed to remain a fantasy. Acting on it can lead to hurt feelings and negative situations that are hard to get out of. When it's just a thought in your head that puts a smile on your face, it is a safe alternative that will allow you to explore yourself and your wants without risking an extremely unhappy ending.

Some women are not capable of leaving their fantasies in their heads. You may have found yourself in this situation, as many others have. It is easy to become so wrapped up in these fantasies that you become obsessed with a potential outcome and are determined to take action. In these instances, the temptation to take a little harmless flirting to the next level can quickly escalate into a dangerous situation where a lot of people's feelings are at risk. Luckily, there are ways to keep yourself grounded in reality so that you don't make a hurtful mistake.

• For a lot of women who find themselves attracted to married or otherwise unavailable men, the thrill is in the chase. If this man were to get divorced, would you still feel the same way? Think about where your desire for this guy actually stems from. Sometimes the things we can't have are more appealing specifically because we can't have them.

• If you're thinking of acting on your desires (or already have), it's a good idea to take into consideration the fact that your relationship with this man is only sexual. Even if you have great conversations and he seems affectionate, he is still married and committed to a woman who is not you, and that is not likely to change.

• Never forget that society can be very, very harsh on women in your situation. Regardless of how your affair with this married man progresses, if any of your neighbors, friends or coworkers find out, it could be disastrous for your relationships. People will look down on you. It will be even worse if his marriage suffers for it.

• Remember that he is not likely to fall for you, but you are likely to fall for him. Even if you believe you can handle a no-strings-attached type of relationship, your body is wired to respond emotionally to sexual stimulation. Believing you can fight that urge doesn't mean that your brain won't produce the same chemicals and hormones. You are very likely to have your heart broken, even if you enter into the affair convinced that you are emotionally invincible.

By Hannah E Fairfield